Hate Your Temperament Type?

Each of us has, at some time, wished we had the traits of another person.  I wish I was as (cool/smart/beautiful/add your own) as so-and-so.  Why are we so dissatisified with the cards we were dealt?  I’m not sure I have the answer but it’s a good lead in to this question from a reader:

“I do hate my personality.  I’m a health care professional. I have always been the quiet, shy guy.  Good at my career but avoid going to far out of the box therefore give up a lot of career opportunities.  I wish I could be comfortably outgoing.  Is there any way at 47 years old that I could change that?  At my age I still don’t like my personality, it holds me back in more ways than one.”

My response:  It does no good to hate your personality any more than you can hate your eye color.  Your temperament is something you received from birth and heritage.  Personally I am extremely introverted but I’ve had to learn (some by being forced and some by making myself) to function well in an extroverted world.  And I fail at that as often as I succeed but the trick is to never quit trying.

Remember that your temperament is only one aspect of personality.  You CAN make behavioral changes that will offset natural shyness.  Join a small group, get some counseling, find an equally introverted friend and challenge each other to be more outgoing.

I know it’s a struggle but keep after it and let me know if I can help in any way.

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