This person is very easy going, typical of a Phlegmatic.  He’s quiet but not overly so and enjoys the office relationships.  But he’s also in charge of the financial part of the business and here his Melancholy “shines”.  He is very detailed when it comes to business dealings and has everything documented — you could say he crosses his T’s and dots his I’s very carefully.

The temperament combination shows in his reaction to problems or questions regarding technical issues.  They typically go along this line:  ”With (X) situation you SHOULD do the following (A, B, C) but it’s up to you; whatever you want to do.”  This makes me laugh because his Melancholy is clear on what HE thinks should be done but his Phlegmatic always gets in a last word.

So you can spot a Phlegmatic Melancholy by statements like “You SHOULD do such and such but it’s up to you, I don’t care.”

The book is 8 short stories; I’ve provided a sample story you can download here for free.  And I’ve provided the same sample story as an MP3 file you can download and listen to here.

The book is available here for $.99 — the stories are for children from 7 to 12 years of age.

Just to reiterate – your temperament is only the foundation; adding in family, upbringing, schooling, encouragement from others – this is your PERSONALITY.  A Phlegmatic can become more outgoing if motivated.  A Melancholy can learn that their comments can build up and not tear down.  A Choleric can learn sensitivity and a Sanguine can learn to be organized.

Don’t blame your place in life totally on your temperament.  Use what you learn about your natural “bent” to create a plan of growth and self improvement.

My simplified definition of non-verbal communication is this: everything BUT your words. Your tone of voice, body language, the car you drive, your accent – any of these can communicate to others.

So an outgoing Sanguine would be recognizable by their warm, friendly, “touchy feely” approach. As a Phlegmatic I was surprised to find that some of my high school contemporaries thought me “stuck up” when I was really just quiet. A Melancholy is probably going to be meticulous in their dress.

A Choleric? Well, I’m not sure – what’s your temperament’s non-verbal language?

But if you combine an anxious Phlegmatic with a critical/analytical Melancholy you have the potential for someone who continually analyzes these anxieties making them worse.  A Phlegmatic Melancholy may seem easy-going but still be fearful underneath.  The main problem seems to be a sense of “false responsibility” taken for the problems of others.  For example, a worrier may think that if they don’t handle their job perfectly they will face job loss.  Or is they don’t help a spouse succeed by filling in their weaknesses, the spouse will fail.

The answer?  Not a clear one however the Phlegmatic needs to take a sincere and focused look at whether their anxieties are fact-based or simply false responsibility.

Lately it’s been waking me early in the morning; hours before I’m supposed to be up and then I can’t get back to sleep. I read recently that early morning is when certain neuro-chemicals are at their lowest. Then I read that early morning low blood sugar can also magnify anxiety.

I don’t know that I have any answers here — or even specific questions. Each temperament has its own set of weaknesses that have to be dealt with — anxiety just happens to be mine. How do you deal with yours?

But what happens when one person has two conflicting temperament types as primary and secondary?  Remember that each of us is typically a blend to two temperament types – the primary is the way we NORMALLY react to life and circumstances and the secondary often pops up in a variety of unexpected ways.

I’ve often heard from individuals who are stressed by the differences of their two types.  For example, I am Phlegmatic Choleric; a laid back individual with a driver secondary.  And that can be good – and sometimes bad.  I am often chosen as a group leader because the Phlegmatic in me wants everyone to get along and work together and the Choleric in me wants to accomplish goals and keep things moving forward.

But the impatience of my Choleric is often at odds with my lazy Phlegmatic to the point that I get very frustrated.  Another example – my wife is a Sanguine Melancholy; a warm outgoing friendly person that everyone easily likes and wants to be around.  But the disorganization of her Sanguine causes her organized and critical Melancholy to have “fits” from time to time.  The Melancholy wants to be orderly and the Sanguine doesn’t care that much.

The unhappiest combination I have seen is the Melancholy Choleric.  Highly organized and driven, the MelChol can be a fantastic surgeon or other detail-driven occupation.  But the critical nature of the Melancholy combined with the anger sometimes resident in the Choleric can cause for a lot of personal unhappiness.  In fact I had one reader tell me that no one liked them and that they didn’t like themselves!

This, in part, is why I find understanding temperament so important.  If you understand that some of these internal conflicts are part of your natural “wiring”, it may not solve the problems but may make them easier to bare and deal with.

So why blends are the “best”?  Well, maybe next time.

Cholerics seem least likely because they tend to see nothing wrong with they way that they are. Phlegmatics may simply not care enough. Sanguines are always interested in learning and hearing about others and Melancholies are most likely to worry and want to analyze why they (and others) are the way they are.

Anyone feel differently? And what would each type be most interested in finding out about? Themselves or others?

This helped me a great deal with one of my co-workers; when you ask this person a question he begins talking about it, bringing up past experiences, talking through potential problems, all while pulling together the answer to the question.  And I realized that many Sanguines will process “out there” in the “real” world by expressing everything verbally.  (Of course we introverts realize that the “real” world is inside us!)

So in “dealing” with a Sanguine remember that they may have the need to “talk through” the question or problem in order to reach an answer.  Since I’m a Choleric secondary, that takes PATIENCE.

How about you?  Do you process “out there” or “in here”?

Hello Hal:

Thanks so much for sending me the e-book. I appreciate this very much and will be reading it cover to cover. . I will be grateful if you could answer a query for me that has been plaguing me for sometime now.

I have taken many personality tests. It turns out that I always end up with either ENTP or ENFP. However when I read the career choices for these, I resonate with arts, humanities, literature that are all ENFp choices.

Yet I see myself as  – Melancholic (critical, analytical, highly organized, easily repressed/discouraged, valuing few friends, living in a fantasy world, making humanitarian plans without having the practicality to implement them, emotional, poetic, philosophical), – Choleric (easily angered/irritated, ambitious, driven, visionary BUT NOT action oriented or brusque or rude), – Sanguine (enjoy company and gaiety, want to make an impression, need to have fun and romance and excitement, love good food and clothes, like to project an image, love esthetics, great communication skills, very talkative).

How can I synthesise the info from these two systems? Can I be a melancholic-sanguine combo?

And here is my reply.

Here are my thoughts.  This post on www.introvert.cc talks about reconciling the DiSC (phlegmtic, sanguine, choleric, melancholy) with Myers-Briggs – something that is somewhat difficult to do.

This blog posting covers a brief attempt to reconcile the two personality systems.

So trying to “peg” you via a Myers-Briggs/DiSC approach is difficult for me.  Here are my “rules of thumb” for spotting your natural temperament.  First, what is your GENERAL approach to life – that is, are you (under normal circumstances – no crises or other hubbub) 1) fairly laid back, 2) usually a driver (moving forward at any cost), 3) warm, talkative and people-oriented or 4) staying organized.

Answer key: 1) Phlegmatic, 2) Choleric, 3) Sanguine, 4) Melancholy.

To find your secondary, I usually look at the weaknesses in each temperament type.  Under pressure or stress do you 1) try to hide or avoid the pressure, 2) drive forward to the point of running roughshod over others, 3) have sharp but short-lived emotional outbursts, 4) become sharply critical of others?  Answer key is the same.

There are excellent DiSC tests available; some of them free.  Someday maybe I’ll write a definitive comparison of Myers-Briggs and DiSC – naw, I’m a Phlegmatic . . .

Hal Warfield